What should I do if my daughter's school insists on keeping her back a year?
Dear Comrades (And I do not use that word lightly. It is a war we fight everyday for our children), I have a dilemma that I am struggling with and really need other parents thoughts who go through the same worries that I feel everyday. Berkley (my angel) has been blind since birth. She has some thyroid problems, however other than that she is "normal"! What a term..."normal". My husband and I don't even see Berkley as disabled until we face issues as the one we now face. She is four years old now and just finishing her first year of Pre-K in public school. We have just had a meeting with her IEP team who tell us that she needs to repeat Pre-K and not go on to Kindergarten. This was a shock to us! When we looked at the goals that they said she did not master, we know that she has completed each and every one of them at home. To this they say, there is no "crossover and consistency" of behavior at school. They have determined that Kindergarten will be too fast-paced for her and will stress her out to the point of making her dislike attending. She enjoys school now. They state we will be setting her up for failure if we "push" her to Kindergarten. I do not want anything but success for her, however I do not want her to be in a babysitting situation for another year either. Do you or anyone you may know have some knowledge of this type of situation. A lot of the research deals with babies and toddlers and them jumps to the 3rd and 4th grade years in school. I cannot find anything about this age for education. I am just looking for any knowledge of someone who may have been through this. Thanks for listening. Cheryl Parsons.
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Posted by Amber Bobnar on Apr 14, 2012 - 8:24pm
Answers from our Facebook page:
"Well, is she ready or does Mom just want her to be? I'd be asking alot of questions. This is not an absolute; there are and will be issues either way."
"Ask to see the testing that they have done to prove it. If they don't have solid facts, ask for them in writing."
Posted by Amber Bobnar on Apr 14, 2012 - 8:28pm
Hi Cheryl,
We decided to hold my son back an extra year from kindergarten, but he had just developed seizures and was not in a good place for a transition. It sounds like your daughter is in a very different place.
You might want to check out this article by a mom transitioning her daughter to kindergarten:
http://www.wonderbaby.org/articles/most-restrictive-environment
Her story is different, but I think it's really interesting to see how her school was so willing to work with them and compromise. Hopefully you can get Berkley's school to do the same. Maybe you could look at getting her to attend the kindergarten classroom a few times a week before she transitions full time. Are the pre-k and kindergarten in the same building or on the same campus?
If you're interested, you can find more education-related articles written by parents with young visually impaired kids (in the pre-k and kindergarten age) here:
http://www.wonderbaby.org/articles/special-education
Posted by Beth Falejczyk on May 12, 2012 - 1:14pm
It is always a difficult call whether or not to hold back a child. In my experience, schools rarely ever hold back a child for fear of social stigma, even at times, to the detriment of the child. What is worse, being held back to support success or moving ahead and failing? In the case of preschool, I don't know how much of an issue it really is socially since the child has not truly been in the traditional school setting yet. I currently work as a special ed paraprofessional at a school and have seen the result of so many kids that are not ready to move on to the next grade, but due to school policy, they do and the child struggles the entire year. With the decreased funding and emphasis on successful assessments, there are very little resources to give a struggling child the attention they really need to be successful. That being said, ask yourself these questions:
What is the age of your child in comparison with her class? If they are a young 4 year old, it may be beneficial to repeat the year to also allow for social maturity.
What has the school done to help your child progress? As with many blind children the amount of classroom minutes vs. pull out time for other resources i.e. vision, Orientation and Mobility, etc. If the child is spending very little time actually in the classroom, they are going to have a harder time reaching academic goals. This will be a struggle/balancing act their entire educational life.
Is there a possibility of having the child go to kindergarten in the am or pm and hold ALL resource services for the opposite shift. That way, there is no pull out time during instruction and vision and other resources can work to get the child up to grade level during the supplemental hours.
Is the teacher modifying the work to aid in success? Sometimes it is not the child, but how they are being taught. If the teacher is ill equipped to teach a blind child, what good will making the child repeat with that teacher?
Many questions, but you have to ask yourself, has the school exhausted all the options to ensure your child succeeds in the future. If you feel that preschool is just glorified babysitting, then you are probably in the wrong preschool for a blind child. If they have academic goals for a 3 or 4 year old, then they need to do a lot more than just social hour.
Best wishes for you and your child.
What are the goals she is not reaching? Are they academically relevant to kindergarten success?
Posted by marymcd on May 24, 2012 - 8:40am
Hi Cheryl,
I suspect that most parents of blind/ visually impaired kids look to the professionals for expertise that will assist our children, and I'm fairly sure that it's not always a mistake. However, in your case, it would have been a big help to you and your husband if you had been kept up to date with the thinking of the professionals at the Pre-K. Why did they think that a lack of dialogue would be in Berkleys best interests? You could have reassured them ahead of the IEP that, in fact, she possesses and demonstrates at home the skills they have concerns about now and worked with them to encourage your daughter to display her advances at Pre-K. Because they didn't express these concerns until the last possible moment, I, personally, in circumstances similar to the ones you describe here, would dismiss their concerns and trust my daughter to rise to the challenge of Kindergarten. The important questions would now be focused around how you can help them to support and educate your child throughout the coming terms instead of waiting till this time next year to inform you of where they feel your daughter has not achieved as expected. Have you considered insisting on a support plan being designed to minimise the problems Berkley's 'team' anticipate?
I would be MOST reluctant for my child to repeat this year because if in the future she really does need to repeat a year with good, sound, agreed upon reasons, it will not be an option.
(I never refer to other kids as 'normal'- I do refer to them as 'ordinary' though ;) We as parents understand the exceptional efforts of our children to master 'ordinary' skills --- and many 'normal' children could not surmount these hurdles... I believe the terminology used in refference to our kids is very important in assisting with their integration in their wider community.)
Very Best Wishes,
MaryMcD